As a teenager I can recall being told by certain people in authority to “Watch my language,” probably meaning I wasn’t speaking with enough respect. There’s a broader meaning these days that focuses on how people are sizing up and focusing on a problem.
When people speak as if they’re going away from something “I really hope I don’t have another fight with my boss over this” or “I’m going to do my best to stay away from bringing up that topic in the meeting, it’s dangerous”, people are moving away from what they don’t want and all their subconscious hears is what won’t work. The more we brainwash ourselves with negative language, the less effective we will be in getting what we want.
On the other hand, when people speak as if they’re moving toward something, it sounds like this: “I really look forward to the meeting today, I’ve got some new ideas to introduce regarding the topic” or “I am interested in trying out a new approach to handling my boss, I think it can make a big difference in how we communicate.”
Seems like a little thing, doesn’t it? Yet it can make all the difference in the world. Listen to the language of successful people, and listen to the language of those who are not happy with where they are in life. Changing the focus changes what we bring into our consciousness and how we create the outcomes we want. Author Stephen Covey reminded his readers to begin with the end in mind. He didn’t tell readers to avoid what they didn’t want, but to put energy and talent into focusing on what they wanted to create and achieve. That small nuance in thinking can reap really big results.
