Have you ever said something to yourself like, “If my boss really valued me, then she’d say so” or “If my brother-in-law really wanted to spend time with me, then he’d do something I like.” We can fill in the blanks endlessly with relatives, spouses,...
Were you ever unlucky enough to have a bad boss or teacher? Someone who kept reminding you of what you weren’t good at? Naturally no one is great at everything; it’s never how smart we are, it’s how we are smart. When we’re of a certain age or in a...
As a youngster I loved to tell scary stories. I’d often have friends over and we’d spread sleeping bags out in the basement, bring down all sorts of snacks, and turn off all the lights. Then the stories began. They were fun and we’d laugh and scream and eventually get...
Many years ago, I went on a date from an online dating service. We had connected online, and when I met him he was smart, charming and good looking. And then he began talking. I was so amazed at how he never came up for air, never asked me a thing about myself, that I...
Remember when you were a little kid and you suddenly had a growth spurt and everyone around you commented “Look how big you’re getting, my goodness.” If you were like me you preened, you were so proud of outgrowing childhood. Finally! Now imagine you could...
Talking to a client recently who was stressed over the holidays, she talked about having to do things that didn’t really feel right to her. She didn’t like the holidays and resented doing what she felt she had to do. This reminded me of author Martha Beck’s best...
