Nod if you’ve ever heard someone say “It’s just how I am, I can’t help it.” What a catch phrase for anything we don’t want to put the energy and time into changing. Of course, we aren’t just the way we are with no tools to change, but it can be a handy excuse for people who aren’t in the market for change.
In Dr. Sue Varma’s book, Practical Optimism, she gives us an acronym to examine what we’re still holding onto, that may be sapping our energy or robbing us of our ability to move forward.
AIM:
A is for Acknowledging our life decisions, the good ones and the ones that weren’t so good. They all made us who we are; we did the best we could at the time. I spent years brooding on decisions I made when I was 17 and younger. What was I thinking, I’ve asked myself about a zillion times. And I can’t imagine how much energy I’ve expended trying to berate myself over something that cannot be changed. Acknowledge and let go, is a good mantra.
I is for Identifying what’s working and what could be changed in your life right now. What’s bringing you meaning, what feels like drudgery. Where do you need to make small changes to allow for more happiness and less stress?
M is for Moving Forward. Decide to take some baby steps (or bigger steps as well, but small steps are the ones we typically keep on doing until we see much bigger results). It’s when we feel stuck, unable to do anything that we start to feel helpless, impotent and a victim. When we say hell yes, we can do something here, then we start to make incremental progress, and that’s an incredibly powerful thing.
