Isn’t it interesting how often we know there’s something more we want to do in our lives or plan to do sometime in the future, but it never seems to happen. It’s always out there in the future, waiting to be actualized.Novelist George Eliot reminded us “It’s never too...

She was absolutely wrong regarding when we were having our phone meeting (I went back and doublechecked) and it took all my control not to send her an email to prove it. My ego was begging me to showher I was right. And there’s this person in my life who has radically...

My cat Nala has no fear of the unknown, in fact he craves it. He’s forever sneaking into the crevice of acabinet opening where he has no business going; he’s gotten stuck numerous times. He never tellshimself, “You haven’t tried that before, it might not work out for...

What’s the first thing you do when making morning coffee or brushing your teeth? As creatures of habit, we tend to do the same things in the same way over and over again. Move a wastebasket and paper hits the floor because we’re used to tossing paper where the basket...

Remember Etch a Sketch, the fun drawing toy for kids? Whether your drawing was great or awful, allyou had to do was turn it upside down and shake and everything vanished, you got to start over. And how does that relate to anything in particular? Think of a situation...

In a class I was teaching the other day I asked everyone to share one of the best pieces of advice they’d ever received. A young woman floored me with a comment from her grandmother, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” What do you think? My first inclination was to...

“If you want to test your memory,” said George F. Burns, “try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today.” Let’s make it easier, try to think about something that really worried you two weeks ago? One week ago? Yesterday? Worry depletes energy, and...

It was a little before midnight when my flight to LaGuardia landed. There was so much pandemonium on board my first thought was, “Great. A lot of New Yorkers doing what they do, being rude and pushy.“ Finally, my row started moving. Seated next to me was a husband and...

I was paying for jeans at JCPenney the other day and the young cashier was doing everything possible to help me save money. After discovering I had no coupons or discounts, he finally told me what I owed, and I paid. He then shocked me by looking me in the...

Every time I get to my assigned seat on a plane I begin to worry who might sit down next to me and start talking. If they’re really garrulous, I’ll have to put on my serious teaching face and explain I’m working on a project and can’t talk. In other words,...

I don’t know about you, but I find it hard to relax. I like and take vacations, but when I’m home I cram as much as I possibly can into weekends and evenings. I need a break. Apparently, I’m not the only one. We Americans don’t seem to know how to relax, even though...

I had the privilege of working with some great leaders at ADKF in San Antonio recently, and at the end of the class I asked everyone to please take their buttons and pass them on to colleagues who hadn’t attended. These buttons had positive affirmations on them, and...

Years ago, I was recommended by Dun & Bradstreet to teach a presentational skills class to all employees of a very large bank in Manhattan. It was a really big opportunity and the head of HR asked if I could give her a 20-minute preview of how I...

Have you ever said something to yourself like, “If my boss really valued me, then she’d say so” or “If my brother-in-law really wanted to spend time with me, then he’d do something I like.” We can fill in the blanks endlessly with relatives, spouses,...

Were you ever unlucky enough to have a bad boss or teacher? Someone who kept reminding you of what you weren’t good at? Naturally no one is great at everything; it’s never how smart we are, it’s how we are smart.  When we’re of a certain age or in a...

As a youngster I loved to tell scary stories. I’d often have friends over and we’d spread sleeping bags out in the basement, bring down all sorts of snacks, and turn off all the lights. Then the stories began. They were fun and we’d laugh and scream and eventually get...

Many years ago, I went on a date from an online dating service. We had connected online, and when I met him he was smart, charming and good looking. And then he began talking. I was so amazed at how he never came up for air, never asked me a thing about myself, that I...

Remember when you were a little kid and you suddenly had a growth spurt and everyone around you commented “Look how big you’re getting, my goodness.” If you were like me you preened, you were so proud of outgrowing childhood. Finally! Now imagine you could...

Talking to a client recently who was stressed over the holidays, she talked about having to do things that didn’t really feel right to her. She didn’t like the holidays and resented doing what she felt she had to do. This reminded me of author Martha Beck’s best...

William James, often called the father of American psychology, once said that when people think they’re thinking, they’re just rearranging their prejudices. And the same might be said for all of us if we make sure we go to the same people, same channels, same news...